Wake up...at 4am. Three hour drive from Islamorada to Jupiter, where i'm diving today. I haul my butt out of bed and hit the road early. The drive is nice...there's no one on the road. I sip a fancy coffee and make good time getting to Riverwalk dive centre.
7:30 - Arrive at riverwalk a half hour too early. No biggie. I sit down on a bench and read some Stephen King. It's a nice morning. I even managed not to walk into the giant spiderweb in the parking lot.
8:00 - No one from the dive centre is here yet...I knock on the door to the shop but it's empty. There's no one. I start doing laps around the area, over to the harbour, back to the other side of the store...nobody.
8:30 - Still no one. I drive down the road a bit to McDonalds to leech the WiFi. Yes, this is the right address. No, there's not another address anywhere on their website. No, I don't have any e-mails from them.
9:00 - Still no one. The boat was supposed to go out at 9. I am running out of ideas. I start driving up and down the road to see what I can see.
9:30 - I spot another dive centre across the road. They're not open yet. I figure okay, i'll wait until they're open and see if maybe I can dive with them. In the meantime, I turn on my cell and in spite of the roaming charges I phone the hell out of the Riverwalk dive centre...but get no response.
10:00 - The other dive centre opens. They let me know that the Riverwalk boats go out of a marina about fifteen minutes away. How was I supposed to know that? I get in my car.
10:15 - I arrive at a place marked "Jupiter Dive Centre". They have their own website. I was booked to dive with them tomorrow, but apparently, the Riverwalk dive boats go out of here as well. Nice and easy for the lay person to figure out. There's no afternoon boat, but they offer to put me on the afternoon boat tomorrow. I say let's hold off on that...i'm determined to dive today.
11:00 - I return to the other dive shop. They say they can put me on a shark dive at 4! Amazing success. I pay my dollars, gear up, load the car, and confirm (and double confirm) where and when to get the boat. It's a little sketchy though...he keeps asking how experienced I am, I say well enough I s'pose. He says he just wants to make sure I know what I'm in for, and that it will be a crazy adventure and not a leisurely dive. I say that's fine. When I ask if it's a shark feeding dive, he says, this is the type of boat where what happens on the boat, stays on the boat. I'm skeptical...and a little uneasy, but at this point, I've been awake for 7 hours and still haven't dived yet. I'm getting in the goddamn water.
12:00 - I have a mini-breakfast/lunch. It's bagel and egg, with spinach. Suits me just fine. I hop on the wifi and find a Starbucks with a patio to hole up at until it's time to dive at 4.
3:00 - I'm powering through this Stephen King book. I don't want to miss this boat, so I head up to the marina early. The directions take me exactly where i'm supposed to be, first try. Awesome. Boat's not there yet, but i'm early. No biggie.
3:30 - Boat should be here to load up by now...but it isn't. Bartender at a nearby bar lets me know where they park and where they come in, but both spots are empty. A cop, armed with dual pistols and wearing body armor is skulking about, but I think nothing of it.
3:45 - Boat still isn't here. I wind up standing next to the cop at the refueling dock. He asks if i'm waiting for the dive boat to come in. I say yes. He asks if I know anyone on that boat. I say no, and ask why? He says he wanted to ask me to call and find out how close they were to being back in port. I told him they should've been back by now, and call the dive centre to see what the fuck is up. They say they'll get the captain on the radio and call me back.
4:10 - Dive centre calls back. Says they're so sorry...but there IS no 4:00 boat. They don't know what happened. Apparently the captain cancelled 'cause there weren't enough people to go out. He's a 3rd party charter. Communication breakdown. Seems somewhat suspect, if you ask me. They say maybe they can put me on a night dive somewhere and ask me to head back to the shop. I leave the cop by the seaside, without saying anything. I'm suspicious, but don't want to be anymore involved than I already seem to be.
4:30 - Back at the dive centre, no one's got a night dive happening tonight. They apologize and apologize. They offer to book me tomorrow, but i'm already booked with Jupiter Dive Centre. They do a really nice thing, refund all my money and let me keep the equipment to take diving with their rival dive centre the next day, as an apology for not getting me on a boat. I've now been awake more than twelve hours...i've spent three of those driving, and another 3 at a Starbucks. None of them have been spent diving. What a colossal waste. I'm glad i'll get underwater tomorrow for a lot less dollars...but now i've spent a whole day on vacation on very little sleep....doing....NOTHING. I'm pissed.
5:00 - I return to the Starbucks for lack of another place to go (I'm 3 hours from my hotel room), and over the next hour, finish my book. They gave me a half-price coffee 'cause of some promotion. It's small consolation for the absence of diving.
6:00 - I angrily sit and eat at the Outback. Everything tastes like butter, fried in butter. It's made pleasant only by the giant beer and low price. I play candy crush by myself at a table, and don't know what my next move is. I drink my beer and try to get a handle on my frusturation.
6:45 - I've decided not to be angry...it's only going to make an already irritating day worse. I check the sunset time, and it's scheduled for just after 8. Plenty of time to find a good vantage point.
7:15 - I find a beautiful lighthouse at the river's edge. It's very nice, but the bend in the river hides the sun, so I go back across the bridge and find a small fishing pier instead.
7:30 - I finally feel good, for the first time today. The sunset is really beautiful, the weather is nice, and tomorrow, I will dive again. Deep breaths. Serenity now.
8:00 - The sun sinks behind the clouds, and then the horizon. It's a nice note to end on...but it's no dive. No sir. I check into the cheapest motel in Jupiter with the money i've saved on renting gear. Might as well save myself 6 hours of driving, and several hours of sleep. It's only a few dollars more than what I would've spent on gas, anyway. I turn on Shark Week and blog my frustration away, and I feel a tiny bit better. One thing's for sure...
Come hell or high water, I am diving tomorrow.
-Jeff
This is the first of your blogs I have read and found it very entertaining. Not quite Monty Python level of dry humour, but the bit with the police officer sets my mind reeling with possibilities! :D
ReplyDeleteHow did you not ask anymore questions?? you were supposed to be on that boat that the cop was waiting for?!?!?
ReplyDelete